Longer II

“1. Falling in love with someone’s mind takes time.
2. Sometimes the only right answer is an answer. Silence can break a heart as easily as words.
3. Never rush a kiss.
4. You know you’re starting to fall in love with someone when you want to hold their hand. Even if it’s just a couple of entangled fingers.
5. Read books cover-to-cover, because sometimes all it takes is one line and greatness is usually well beneath the surface.
6. People will try to change you. Sometimes for you, sometimes for them. Know the difference. Trust yourself to know the difference.
7. Sometimes sex is awkward. You have to be able to laugh about it. Laugh until it’s mind-blowingly-amazing.
8. Life isn’t about winning. (Losing at strip poker can be pretty fun.)
9. You are capable of hurting someone far more than you realized.
10. Letting go takes two people.
11. Some people will see right through your armor. That takes time and effort. Appreciate it.
12. People can break you. Only you can heal you.
13. Liking the taste of beer on someone’s lips doesn’t equal liking beer, it equals liking them a whole lot more than you’re willing to admit. But order that beer. And another. One more. It might make your walls crumble for long enough to let you realize how you feel; or let them see.
14. Some conversations can only be had if you’re sitting across from each other.
15. Sometimes a kiss tells you what you don’t want to hear.
16. Falling out of love with someone’s mind takes time. But it’s OK to lie to yourself and pretend it was all about the eyes. For a little while.
17. Moving on takes time. It takes patience and self-love. There isn’t a cosmic sign, or a moment of epiphany, you won’t wake up feeling different one morning. Order a beer once in a while. Take a sip. Close your eyes. What does the taste tell you?”

-Things I learned from loving a boy and letting him go, by m.v

 

1) it feels a little bit like those summer days when the sky is completely clear and then clouds gather… no, no, appear, from nowhere and before you know it heavy drops are hitting your temple and your tears are no longer the only things soaking your cheeks and now everything is different, heavy, but also kind of clean, and it’s over just when you get your umbrella to open. it might start again. you don’t know when.

2) it feels a little bit like when you’re watching your favourite show and it’s your favourite scene and suddenly it stops and the wheel keeps turning, and turning, and turning, but it’s not loading, and you sit there and you stare at it and wait. it feels a little bit like that.

3) it feels a little bit like a hangover, but not the easy kind, the kind that an aspirin can fix, no it feels like the hangover that you get from mixing too many kinds of alcohol, the kind you can only wait out, with a heavy head and a body that aches and fuzziness, yes fuzziness, because your brain can’t focus and it’s not that you’re thinking about other things, it’s that you can’t think, it’s that thoughts are an actual effort, and the light hurts your eyes and all music is too loud and no, you don’t want to see people.

4) it feels a little bit like first heartbreak because the world seems the same but also infinitely different and you can’t remember how you used to do things, how you made sense of washing the dishes and how you used to do your laundry and how homework made sense, suddenly the world is a scary place, a strange place and you’re afraid, you’re alone and afraid.

5) it feels like being in a room with no doors and no windows, but being told that there is a way out and you try, you do, you try to figure it out, except that you’re too sad and too tired and what’s the point really, the sunshine would just burn your skin and people are callous and mean and maybe you’d rather stay here. maybe. but then you check the walls for secret seams, again, and maybe there’s something you missed. maybe. and it’s the constant maybe, the inability to want, to desire, to just know. it’s the maybe that’s the end of things.”

-What does depression feel like?, by m.v

 

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